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SEASON 2, EPISODE 2: The Side Account Uprising No Tri-Best Buddies were harmed in the making of this episode. OK, maybe one. Just one. But that's... IT.
Brought to you in part by:
Narrator: Some epic news music begins playing. Stills of nearby forum sub-sections, such as General Chat and Wisdom Discussion, can be seen. An amazing graphic animation is displayed, showing the C9N Title. Channel Nine News; live from C9N HQ with Wesley Myers, Ralph Ziggles, and Dxthegod.
Dxthegod: ---NTER WRAP UP, WI...WHAT? WE'RE ON AIR? Uhhh... I... er, see... um... WELCOME TO CHANNEL NINE NEWS, EVERY PON--UH, EVERY... BODY... DAMNIT... Wesley: Hooked on... that... still... well, there goes our show, down the drain... Dxthegod: IN TEN SECONDS FLAT!!! Mr. Ziggles: What is the purpose of the titanium walls and steel-enforced window panes? Dxthegod: Oh, that... right... well, see... a new law has been enforced which has banned all multiman companies, leaving the founder of said company all alone, while the others are... KILLED!
Mr. Ziggles: And you feel the best way to deal with it is record our exact location and have it broadcast live on TV so the Mods know exactly where we are? Dxthegod: You'd think it were that simple, eh? See, you see that broom closet over there? Wesley: Don't tell me--- Dxthegod: That's right. In you go! The only way they won't be able to see you is if they can't see you. Mr. Ziggles: Um, that didn't make any sense. Plus, I'm sure they've already seen us both, at least onc--- Dxthegod: MOVE IT! Wesley: But... who will run the show? You can't run this thing by yourself... Dxthegod: I'm sorry, did you just tell me what I can and can't do? I ran the first five episodes by myself, did I not? Mr. Ziggles: Well... yes... but... Dxthegod: ENOUGH! Away with you! In you go, scoot! Don't come out until I give the signal. Wesley: Signal? What si--- Dxthegod: SILENCE!!! Now, introducing, the one and only, THE LEGENDARY...
Narrator: As the Star Wars music blares over the thirty dollar stereo, lights turn on in such a fashion that they light a dim hallway, revealing two figurines of familiar looking individuals. As they slowly approach the studio, they become clearer and clearer.
Dxthegod: .....*Glances down at watch*.... LET'S GO PEOPLE, WE DON'T HAVE ALL DAY! TaylorSaysMoo: Sorry... Gonzales: EXCUUUUUUUUUSE US FOR TRYING TO MAKE A DYNAMIC ENTRY! Dxthegod: Well, it was good, it just needed to be about twenty percent cooler.
Narrator: Suddenly, the music stops. (That means pause it, idiot.)
Gonzales: First order of business, Commander? Dxthegod: Gonzales! See to it that... that... uh... actually I think we're all good here... TaylorSaysMoo: SIR, YES MA'AM! ....Wait what? Dxthegod: Alright, pick what segment you want to hos--- Gonzales: SHOTGUN INTERVIEWS!!! Dxthegod: ---ost.... uh... OK, so I guess that leaves Taylor with... TaylorSaysMoo: Guess That Word! ...Or something... idk c: Dxthegod: You can be... um... well, we'll figure it out later, we'll just have to... run multiple shifts for now. EVERYONE? TO YOUR STATIONS! Gonzales: But... you just said... Dxthegod: THE CHAIRS BESIDE ME! Designed specifically to match your individual needs! Taylor, your chair is... uh... it looks like something from Minecraft... I dunno, use your imagination. And Gonzales, your chair is encrusted with... uh... that THING YOU love. Look again, the chair is now Fluttershy! Gonzales: I'M NOT GOING TO SIT ON FLUTTERSHY!!! SHE'S SO ADORABLE... I'll just stand. Dxthegod: Whatever floats your boat, I guess... and hey, I thought we agreed no ponies! Gonzales: Hey, you ordered this chair, not me. Dxthegod: ....Touché. TaylorSaysMoo: MOO!!!! Dxthegod: Well, we have no one to interview, so here's something new.
A TYPICAL DAY ON THE SHOUT
kolemiller: hi ChaosI: Hi. ChaosI: How are you? Cuca: NO U kolemiller: i just made a cool level ChaosI: Cool, can I try it? Maco: Bluh. kolemiller: ok I'll pm you link BurningGoldFish: doopdoopdoop ChaosI: Ok ChaosI: Hi BGF, How are you? Cuca: BurningGoldFish: doopdoopdoop SCREENY'D AND PMING TO LANDO MarioLord: ohai Cuca: GO AWAY hi BurningGoldFish: omg I hate memes. I don't see why everyone likes them. Other than that, good. ChaosI: That's good! Dxthegod: http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm98 ... e-king.jpg Cuca: OMG RUN ITS DX ChaosI: kole, I'm stuck at x400 in your level, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU DO, TELL ME Cuca: jk hi Dxthegod: hi MarioLord: Your guys' lack of humor sickens me so im going, bye kolemiller: just hold right chaos idiot LOL Dxthegod: http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm98 ... o1_500.png kolemiller: NO U ML kolemiller: OMG ITS DX GO AWAY Dr.Goomba: lando is on Dr.Goomba: lando Dxthegod: kolemiller: (jk) Dr.Goomba: lando ChaosI: Rated your level, kole Dxthegod: Yes, we're aware of that kolemiller: ty Dr.Goomba: lando Maco: Bluh. Dr.Goomba: lando ChaosI: gotta go though, good night/afternoon/whatever time of day it is for you everyone! Cuca: NO SPAMS PLEASE Dr.Goomba: lando Dr.Goomba: lando ChaosI: k bye BurningGoldFish: 46.224.185.32:24573 Dr.Goomba: lando Dr.Goomba: lando kolemiller: Dr.Goomba: lando Dr.Goomba: lando Dr.Goomba: lando Dr.Goomba: lando Dr.Goomba: lando Dr.Goomba: lando OMG PMING TO LANDO Dxthegod: Captain Obvious: doc Captain Obvious: doc Dxthegod: http://i294.photobucket.com/albums/mm98 ... 3dprw6.gif Captain Obvious: doc Dr.Goomba: lando hi Dxthegod: bye CLM: DOC! L Captain Obvious: L Maco: Bluh. Dr.Goomba: LLLLLLLL glitchblaster555: hi guys Dj Gopher: STRENGTH IS FLUFFY AND WARM CLM: OMG GLITCH LETS GO SLAY SOME N00BS EVERYONE ELSE HERE SUCKS LETS GO YEA Dr.Goomba: lando how are you glitchblaster555: L Captain Obvious: fine Captain Obvious: i drove today Dr.Goomba: awwwwww yeeeeaaaaaaa Dr.Goomba: did you see her? Captain Obvious: yea man we like, did stuff and stuff and it was cool and stuff Dr.Goomba: aw thats so cool man Dr.Goomba: yea, hey get on facebook Captain Obvious: im on facebook, retard Dr.Goomba: I DIDN'T KNOW, JERK *10 minutes later* Maco: Loldead. Maco: Bluh. Maco: http://fc09.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2010/ ... nimaru.jpg Gonzales: rawr Maco: Ohai. Gonzales: hai Gonzales: I hate cross country, it's so stupid D: 36gamer: oh hey its gonz. hey gonz I hate you go die Dxthegod: GONZY :aws: Gonzales: DXTHEGODY :aws: Dxthegod: go to xat Gonzales: Why are you so mean to me and DXtg, 36? D: 36gamer: mean? what the hell are you talking about? I love you man CLM: lol gonz you guys are so gay Gonzales: Please don't call us that, it can be offensive. CLM: you guys are gay for liking that show that I like but like making fun of you for liking it cuz it's gay I'm always right. Dxthegod: OMG JERK BAN BAN BAN CLM: omg I will laugh so hard if you actually ban me Gonzales: *Bans CLM for a perfectly legitimate reason* Ocelot: SHUUUUUUUUUUN THE NONBELIEVER Dxthegod: DISRESPECTING MODS, B& Gamer_Mason: Incorrect Moderator action. Ban. Dxthegod: hi ocelot Daisy: o.o hi dx Dxthegod: DAISY HI Ocelot: hi Dxthegod: NOOOOO DONT BAN GONZ HE DIDNT DO ANYTHING D: Daisy: wow... o.o Dxthegod: bronies to xat, GOGOGO 829: . Gamer_Mason: He inadequately handled the situation. 829: 70.189.200.16 Maco: ... goldengrat10: I just got back from some random place after having been gone for X period of time. WHY IS THE UML SO INACTIVE? PLAY SMF FFS! Cuca: no u Mr. Vinderack: GG, Staff Xat please . goldengrat10: Yay, I always look forward to our pointless chats in xat where we attempt to revive the longlost hopes of SMF! Mr. Vinderack: Yea, I have so many cool ideas to revive this place that I just HAVE to show you! .
And I'm lazy now.
Wesley: That's it, I'm coming out of the closet! Dxthegod: Not on MY poorly painted on watch you're not! Narrator: Dxthegod then deadbolts the two closet doors shut, then claps his hands in a triumphant matter. Gonzales: NEEEEEEEEEEXT SEGMENT!
WHAT REALLY GRINDS MY GEARS With your host, Dxthegod
Dxthegod: You know what really grinds my gears? The Flaming Homosexuals. Like... who do they think they are, prancing around like they own the place? OK, even though most of them are staff... because SOMEONE is a BAD ADMIN... yea, well... would they be prancing if... if they had nothing to prance ABOUT? HMMM? WOULD THEY BE PRANCING THEN?! And that's what really grinds my gears.
TEN THINGS AT RANDOM
Spoiler:
GUESS THAT WORD Featuring Tommy Toad and TaylorSaysMoo. (In Hypnovision where available)
TODAY'S WORD: Flavour
Tommy Toad: You a big fan of potato chips, Taylor? TaylorSaysMoo: AM I EVER? MY FAVOURITE FLAVOUR IS--- DING DING DING, WE HAVE A WINNER! Tell 'er what she's won, Tom. Tommy Toad: You've won a braaaand new convertable, with two tickets to that thing you love, located in the glove compartment! Nothing makes you feel more like a man than a Thundercougarfalconbird.
JOKE OF THE DAY
You can't HANDLE the cheese!....iness!
There's three daughters, and the first daughter asks, "Daddy, why is my name Lily?" and he responds, "Well, when you were a baby, we were walking in the woods and a lily fell on your head so we named you Lily." Then the second daughtee asks, "Daddy, why is my name Rose?" and he responds, "Well, when you were a baby, we were walking in the woods and a rose fell on your head so we named you Rose." Finally, the third daughter asks, "Daddy, why is my name Shorty?" and he responds, "Well, because you're a midget, so shut up."
Wesley: ...That joke was neither funny NOR cheesy! It was just downright ret---
Dxthegod: SHUT UP, WESLEY! *ahem* We now go to the final segment, the Video of the Week.
VIDEO OF THE DAY Today's video: "Minecraft: PortalCraft Ultimate - Part 1 (Custom Map Adventure)"
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